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There Are Moms Way Worse Than You
$14.99
A hilarious and reassuring gift for every mom: because we’re all doing the best we can, and the natural world is filled with moms worse than you! A mom giraffe is pretty nice until the fetus drops. She’ll birth a newborn baby calf, then kick him ’til he walks. Whenever you feel guilty that you haven’t cleaned the house: Sexton beetles raise their kids in a decomposing mouse. A koala mom will feed her kids her own poop. Yes, poop. Panda moms will abandon one twin because raising two is, well, just too much. And every now and then a cuddly little hamster mom will — yup — eat her newborn pups. These and other true facts from the animal kingdom offer a hilarious reality check on what constitutes “good parenting.”
Why trust Suite Child?
Since 2013, thousands of customers have trusted us to help find the perfect gifts and gear for their little ones. Whether you're shopping from a baby registry, building your first gift guide, or looking for a meaningful gift, here's why you can shop with confidence.
- Curated gifts & gear: Every product is hand-selected for quality, safety, and giftability. From cozy blankets to first year essentials, we do the research so you don't have to.
- Registry experts: We make it easy to build, share, and shop registries for every milestone, from first baby showers to toddler birthdays.
- Gift guide favorites: We've helped families find products they love and trust, from newborn essentials to toddler favorites. Our curated gift guides take the guesswork out of gifting.
- Safe, trusted brands: We only carry brands that meet our high standards for safety and quality, so every gift you give is one you can feel good about.
- Expert team: Our team is here to answer your questions and help you find exactly what you need, whether it's a first gift or a registry must-have.
- Small business, big heart: When you shop with us, you're supporting a small business that genuinely cares about your family.
- Products you'll love for years to come: Let us help your family find gifts, blankets, and gear you'll treasure from day one.
What if the item I want is out of stock?
If an item you love is currently out of stock, we’re happy to help! Many of our products are restocked regularly. Our team can provide more information about expected availability and estimated arrival dates.
Please email us at customer@suitechild.com or call either of our Suite Child store locations. Our team will be happy to check the item for you and let you know when we expect it to be available again.
Do you offer gift wrapping?
Yes! Gift wrapping is available upon request. If your purchase is a gift, simply let our team know and we’ll be happy to wrap it for you. For online orders, please include your gift wrapping request in the order notes at checkout.
Shipping Policy
SHIPPING:
- FREE local pickup is available in both locations! You will be notified as soon as your order is ready (orders are typically ready within 1-4 hours). If we expect your order to take longer than that, we will contact you as soon as we can.
- All U.S. orders over $125 will receive FREE shipping via USPS, UPS, or FedEx.
- We offer flat rate shipping for only $8.95.
- All shipments will take approximately 3-4 business days. Tracking information is provided via email to the customer at the time the order has completed warehouse processing. We do not process or ship orders on weekends or holidays.
- Some oversized items will have additional shipping charges. We reserve the right to contact you to ask you to pay for additional shipping.
- Suite Child does not ship furniture. If you want to pay to ship furniture, please contact us to get a shipping fee quote.
RETURN POLICY:
- If you’re unhappy with your purchase, we’ll gladly return the product within 30 days of purchase for an exchange, or store credit, or a full refund.
- Returns will not be accepted on items post marked after 30 days, special orders, seasonal items, chairs, opened car seats, or discounted items.
- Items eligible for return/exchange must be unopened/unused, in original packaging with all tags.
- Gifts and gift receipts will receive an exchange or store credit.
- Store credit will be given on a gift card that never expires.
- Refunds will be given in the form of original payment.
- Defective products will be exchanged or handled by the manufacturer.
ONLINE RETURN PROCESS:
- Please reference the above “Return Policy” for return details and eligibility.
- Returns that are being shipped back to Suite Child, must be post marked within 30 days of the original date of purchase; shipping costs will be paid for by the customer.
- Original shipping costs will not be refunded to the customer.
- An exchange, store credit, or a refund will be issued within 5 business days of the return arriving at Suite Child.
- Please include a copy of the original invoice/receipt. If you cannot locate the original invoice, please print and include a copy of the order confirmation emailed to you. Returns received without supporting documentation may have a delayed refund.
- Defective or Damaged Merchandise: Please inspect your order immediately upon receipt. If you believe you have received defective or damaged merchandise, you MUST contact us within 3 days of receipt. No exceptions. If we do not receive notification that you have received a damaged item in 3 days, the return will be rejected for any store credit or refund.
- Please email customer@suitechild.com if you have questions or need additional instructions.